Emotional Intelligence I've been reading an article on emotional intelligence (check it out here), and it hit me how under-valued this type of intelligence is. How many times have you met someone who is incredibly intelligent and well spoken (let's say book smart), yet seems to be unable to carry on a conversation with people, or be able to read when someone is tired or bored.

The article has also left me wondering why men and women seem to be so different with the different types of emotional intelligence.

Example from reading the article -- I would imagine that:

* Women are more comfortable with Personal Competence: self awareness, and Social Competence: Empathy.

* Men are more comfortable with Personal Competence: Self Regulation and Motivation, and Social Competence: Social Skills.

What do you all think? How important is it for a potential mate to read your emotions and non-verbal communication?

Oh, and Take the test (I got a 75 -- would love to know how that compares).  ¶ 5:02 PM 7 Comments

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  Women: remove the following from your vocabulary I just love lists! :)

* The game isn't over yet?? It's been an hour!
* Everything happens for a reason
* Even guys are going to like this movie! (umm.. sure)
* Where is this going?
* Do you prefer to spend time with your friends?
* My friend's boyfriend always gets her ____!
* Sorry I'm being such a bitch. I'm on my period.
* Do you think she's hot?
* If it's meant to be...
* I really think you are amazing. A beautiful friend!
* You would really like my kids.
* How do I taste?
* Are you going to miss me when you go to ____?
* Do these pants make my ass look big?
* Ewww.. I would never kiss another girl!
* Mmmm... that Brad Pitt sure is HOT
* I'm thinking of cutting my hair
* My friends want to leave, so.. bye.

I'm sure I'm missing a lot more, but if you've got some of your own, drop them in the comments!  ¶ 8:49 AM 9 Comments

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  Secure women in relationships One of the things I noticed on my trip was the different ways women act when they are in a relationship. The way I see it, there are 2 types, both of which I ran into:

1. I am at the bar overlooking the ocean (mmm... mentally back there for a moment...), and a woman sits next to me. So the friendly SGB I am, I strike up a conversation about how the weather and how the adult industry has proved seemingly impervious to the fluxuation of the internet economy (it was actually about the lack of service from the bartenders, who were working on different time schedules than most of us are used to), and she played along beautifully! She said that was the reason she moved to that side of the bar, in hopes of actually getting a drink, and we chatted for a few minutes. Then this guy shows up and she introduces him as her fiancee (no ring, though, weird), who jumps in the conversation.
Lesson: You can be smart, beautiful, flirty, and confident in a relationship -- all at the same time!

2. I am in the pool doing laps (i.e. floating near the shallow end), and decide to go jump in the jacuzzi, where a woman is there with her boyfriend. As I jump in, he was jumping out (must have been intimidated), but she stayed in. There were a few others on the other side of the jacuzzi also. I do my best William Shatner impersonation and chat up this stranger, and it goes like this:
me: What a day, huh?
her: nothing
me: Can't beat weather like this. And NO kids in the pool. It sure is relaxing
her: Yes, it's beautiful
me: Oh, you have an accent, are you from Australia?
her: Umm, yeah
me: I've got lots of family there. Is that where you and your boyfriend are from
her: Yes.
me: Ok, well have a nice day! (I duck under the warm water)
Lesson: When this happens to guys, they immediately think that there's a problem with the relationship, and there are so many insecurities that they will eventually lead to infidelity and a bitter end to a relationship.

So be confident ladies, both when you are single and when you begin to date. Trust the person you are with, and make sure there is confidence and trust coming back at you. Otherwise, you are just wasting time and delaying the inevitable.

  ¶ 11:56 AM 3 Comments

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  Travel notes Oh the things you notice while traveling!

1. People who fart on airplanes should be shot (actually, they should have something in the air that lets you trace back to the offending party, so they could be beaten by a line of people like they did on the Airplane movie)

2. When did they start charging for every little thing on a plane? Yet they now also serve mojitos and margaritas? (yes, I got both)

3. Airports are:
a) A place to wait for a flight
b) A place to fall asleep in the middle of the corridor
c) An excuse to take your pets for a walk
d) A place to get sushi, burritos, fresh bread, and $3.75 bottle of water
e) All the above

4. Speedos (aka "banana boats") should be illegal on US soil

5. No tops on women's bikinis should be not only encouraged, but mandatory (given proper height/weight ratios)

6. What's with this fascination for sand castles? I think I tripped over 20 of them this weekend!

7. Speaking of kids -- there should be a separate place for them on a beach. With a big sound-proof wall between them and the rest of humans. And there can be all the sandcastles in the world there. And parents can feel free to change their diapers there.

8. When did the beaches in the US turn into the beaches of Mexico? No, I don't want to take surfing lessons, or go kayaking, or snorkeling. I was waiting for some offers of wooden fish toys and chicklets!

9. Really? $30 to rent an umbrella for the beach for a few hours? Reaaallly???

10. Flying anywhere for a vacation is at least 100 times more fun than flying back. It's depressing, and I can't believe I have to work today. :(  ¶ 10:02 AM 4 Comments

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  To all single women on Valentine's day I've briefly discussed this as posts on others' blogs, but I think it's important enough for me to blog about it here, as this is the place for you to get a better sense of "what men really think about".

364. That is the number of days that women truly have a hold on men. It is the number of days that you can flirt without care, play the "I like you as a friend" card, tease, taunt, and thoroughly captivate our minds and imagination with your beauty and sexuality.

So on this day of St. Valentine, I hope you understand that experience tells us it is the one day where you lower your shield. You start to show the slightest of weakness and vulnerability. You are much like us, with insecurities about your looks or intelligence or sense of humor, and fear of ending up alone in the world. Men know this, and to be honest, we're not quite sure how to deal with it.

Most men simply see it as a way to get "revenge" and take advantage of the situation (after all, can you blame us?). Others go out with their friends, telling themselves they don't care about v-day, happy that they are not in a relationship -- especially seeing how commercialized it is! Have you seen the restaurant menus on these days??. Deep down in our minds, though, we do know that this is a good day to be out there. It's a day we may get to meet the true you. The one that is most like us.

Go enjoy a wonderful night out with your girlfriends ladies. Just remember, tomorrow the clock starts back at 1 again. :)

-SGB  ¶ 10:23 AM 4 Comments

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  Am I back? It's been a long time, and made some good and entertaining friends last time I was here. Maybe it's time to get back into it and re-kindle the joys of guidance, laughter, and disbelief that come with the honesty around what men really think about.

The question is: Anyone still remember me?
LunaVela? GGA? PGH? Elle? NotGirls? TDL?

Also, any other blogs I should be reading and commenting on?

-SGB  ¶ 3:36 PM 6 Comments

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